These holidays seem to be lasting for ever. It's halfway through and I feel like I have done nothing, I think it's because I haven't. Quite bored of that new game I got, doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I've not gotten around to organising a time to meet up with friend from up north yet, I don't really feel like it either.
This weekend coming there is a computer LAN event on which I'm going to go to. It's not the usual one I go to but it's in the same area. It should be good I usually enjoy playing computer games in a more social environment instead of online.
The holidays are really draining me, I feel so empty. It's probably because I just sit on my computer all day. I talk to people online but it's not the same. Recently I have been watching some movies based on Stephen King novels, really good stuff. I think I've watched them all now.
In reply to Steevo about my last post, at university I'll be studying Information Technology Networking. I'll be studying an hour from where I live at the moment.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Long time no see..
Sorry about the late post, the last few weeks have been hectic with end of term assignments etc. I have only just enabled holiday mode really.
My old buddy from up north is away for the first week of holidays although he is keen to catch up in the 2nd half. I will try n reserve transport up there for then, otherwise it might be public transport there and back =\
I know the holidays have not even started yet although I think I can feel already what I fear after I leave school, loneliness, missing my friends. I've been really conscious around this matter recently, most of my good friends are going to be staying in the area, while I set out to move into the city. It's not a huge issue as I can always come and visit them every now and then.
One other thing which has been on my mind recently is the connection between me and my "over liked" friend. I'm not sure if the vibes I'm getting off him is just a really good friendship or "something else". It's not a connection which I have ever experienced with anyone else before, he competes with me, we taunt/tease each other, the list truly goes on. I think that this is my "shy/pussy" instinct although I do have reason not to try anything further on him. WHENEVER he is around a girl he goes crazy on them and almost completely ignores me.
On other news my plans for the holidays involve a nerdy approach, one thing on my list of things to do is learn to touch type and secondly I'm going to be playing a new game which is released in 5 and a half hours, "Aion". I'm really desperately looking for someone to play that game with me at the moment on the oceanic server. No luck for the LGBT communities as they are all playing on the American servers.
That is everything covered, please let me know if you or someone you know is going to play Aion on the server: Nezekan.
Byebye.
My old buddy from up north is away for the first week of holidays although he is keen to catch up in the 2nd half. I will try n reserve transport up there for then, otherwise it might be public transport there and back =\
I know the holidays have not even started yet although I think I can feel already what I fear after I leave school, loneliness, missing my friends. I've been really conscious around this matter recently, most of my good friends are going to be staying in the area, while I set out to move into the city. It's not a huge issue as I can always come and visit them every now and then.
One other thing which has been on my mind recently is the connection between me and my "over liked" friend. I'm not sure if the vibes I'm getting off him is just a really good friendship or "something else". It's not a connection which I have ever experienced with anyone else before, he competes with me, we taunt/tease each other, the list truly goes on. I think that this is my "shy/pussy" instinct although I do have reason not to try anything further on him. WHENEVER he is around a girl he goes crazy on them and almost completely ignores me.
On other news my plans for the holidays involve a nerdy approach, one thing on my list of things to do is learn to touch type and secondly I'm going to be playing a new game which is released in 5 and a half hours, "Aion". I'm really desperately looking for someone to play that game with me at the moment on the oceanic server. No luck for the LGBT communities as they are all playing on the American servers.
That is everything covered, please let me know if you or someone you know is going to play Aion on the server: Nezekan.
Byebye.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
An old friend..
About 4 years ago when I lived with my dad, about 1 hour away from where I am now, there was some kid who I talked to on msn. He is the same age as me although in the grade below me for school.
I can't recall how we first met, all that I can remember is that he was friends of a family friend of mine who is in his year at school. I don't think we even ever talked in person as the topic in which he first contacted me about seemed quite the awkward one to talk to someone about in person. The basis of which he contacted me on was his concern for his "lateblooming" status. He was asking me all of this stuff about if I'd cummed, if I had pubes etc. He'd told me that he was worried that he couldn't cum and thought that it was because he'd been kicked in the balls or something like that. We'd talked casually before he asked me about this and we continued to briefly afterwards. This is Ben as well, for reference.
4 years later, about 5-6 months ago, I was contacted by someone who added me on msn saying that they were old friends of mine when I used to live with my dad. I'd never heard of this person, and to this day I still can't remember ever knowing them. We had casual talks every now and then, until eventually he started dropping massive hints and later telling me how he'd anally pleasure himself. It turned out he was openly Bi. After a week or so we planned to meet up in person when I was going to be in his town next. We chose the time and day that I'd be there and he'd come on msn to decide a place to meet. Of course he never came online and I never got a chance to organize another time. I didn't really feel like anything was right between us either, so I removed him from my msn and ended that. During all of this, I still had Ben on my msn contact list from all of those years ago, but had never talked to him since last time. Since Ben and this other guy were in the same year I asked Ben if he knew him he said yes and seemed interested in knowing how I knew him. That was all the contact I had with Ben for a while.
1-2 months ago. I was asked by Ben for some help with a Maths question he was having some trouble with. I said sure thing and got out a calculator, after quite a while I was still unable to work out the question. I currently do a much easier maths then the maths which he does and I have not done anything like it for a couple of years. He was thankful for my attempt but I was not satisfied that I was complete, so I insisted to take it to school and ask a maths teacher on showing me how to do it as I was interested in knowing myself. At this point he'd already worked it out by cheating and did not have any working out.
After our last contact he had been in touch quite a bit, casually talking every now and then. The last week I have been hinting a bit and waiting for some type of reply, I got it instantly. So I dropped the question, "If I'm following correctly here, you're not straight?". (I checked my msn logs to get some details here and it seems that he was the one dropping the hints at first, lol) He said yes and then said nice guess. I said it was barely a guess and he knew it. We talked for ages after this, hours, until he asked me to come there one day when his parents are away. I said sure thing, tell me in advance and I should be able to borrow mum's car. We finished up the night after 2 and a half hours.
Now, I come out of the shower tonight, look on msn and he is online. I msg him saying hello, and no reply! I'm having a one man debate here if I say hello again or play it cool...
Byebye.
I can't recall how we first met, all that I can remember is that he was friends of a family friend of mine who is in his year at school. I don't think we even ever talked in person as the topic in which he first contacted me about seemed quite the awkward one to talk to someone about in person. The basis of which he contacted me on was his concern for his "lateblooming" status. He was asking me all of this stuff about if I'd cummed, if I had pubes etc. He'd told me that he was worried that he couldn't cum and thought that it was because he'd been kicked in the balls or something like that. We'd talked casually before he asked me about this and we continued to briefly afterwards. This is Ben as well, for reference.
4 years later, about 5-6 months ago, I was contacted by someone who added me on msn saying that they were old friends of mine when I used to live with my dad. I'd never heard of this person, and to this day I still can't remember ever knowing them. We had casual talks every now and then, until eventually he started dropping massive hints and later telling me how he'd anally pleasure himself. It turned out he was openly Bi. After a week or so we planned to meet up in person when I was going to be in his town next. We chose the time and day that I'd be there and he'd come on msn to decide a place to meet. Of course he never came online and I never got a chance to organize another time. I didn't really feel like anything was right between us either, so I removed him from my msn and ended that. During all of this, I still had Ben on my msn contact list from all of those years ago, but had never talked to him since last time. Since Ben and this other guy were in the same year I asked Ben if he knew him he said yes and seemed interested in knowing how I knew him. That was all the contact I had with Ben for a while.
1-2 months ago. I was asked by Ben for some help with a Maths question he was having some trouble with. I said sure thing and got out a calculator, after quite a while I was still unable to work out the question. I currently do a much easier maths then the maths which he does and I have not done anything like it for a couple of years. He was thankful for my attempt but I was not satisfied that I was complete, so I insisted to take it to school and ask a maths teacher on showing me how to do it as I was interested in knowing myself. At this point he'd already worked it out by cheating and did not have any working out.
After our last contact he had been in touch quite a bit, casually talking every now and then. The last week I have been hinting a bit and waiting for some type of reply, I got it instantly. So I dropped the question, "If I'm following correctly here, you're not straight?". (I checked my msn logs to get some details here and it seems that he was the one dropping the hints at first, lol) He said yes and then said nice guess. I said it was barely a guess and he knew it. We talked for ages after this, hours, until he asked me to come there one day when his parents are away. I said sure thing, tell me in advance and I should be able to borrow mum's car. We finished up the night after 2 and a half hours.
Now, I come out of the shower tonight, look on msn and he is online. I msg him saying hello, and no reply! I'm having a one man debate here if I say hello again or play it cool...
Byebye.
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